baby Theo's birth

I had been hoping my brother Nathan and his wife Ana would have a baby for what seemed like a long time, so when they told us back in March they were finally expecting, I was quite excited. Ana said my reaction did not disappoint. Since this was her first baby, I offered to help her. I had done the doula thing once before with my friends Seth and Kagney and hoped I could be useful to Nathan and Ana. 

The first night, Sunday November 2nd, when Terry and Nathan returned from the Fall Retreat exhausted out of their minds, Ana went into labor. Go figure. She was one week early! I got a text that her water broke at 2:30am (Monday) and I went over to their house mid-morning. We went to the doctor for some monitoring and they wanted us to check in to the hospital. That wasn't what we were hoping, but since her water broke it's what had to be done. 

So we went and they hooked her up to the pitocin. Here's proof I was there ;)

That pitocin is nasty stuff. I had it with Noah too and never wanted it again. Ana labored all night and into the following morning. In all, she was in labor for about 30 hours! All my births have been super short so that was something new for me. But Ana was a rock star and we finally got to meet big Theodore Arthur at 8:32am on election day, Tuesday November 4th. He was 8 pounds, 2.3 ounces and 19 inches long. And he had/has the cutest cheeks/jowls ever!

She looked ridiculously well for only getting a few hours sleep in all that time. I got less sleep, wasn't in labor and didn't look so good! That Theo is going be one good looking boy. 

Here's my brother's first time holding the little tyke. I love it. 

Here is Theo's first bath. He shares a name with both of our Grandfathers - Theodore. Arthur is our dad's middle name. They call him Theo and are working on cool nicknames. Of course all of the youth group girls are in love with the name since it's the same as a crush of their's from the movie Divergent - Theo James.

Later that evening we stopped by for literally five minutes just so the kids could meet their newest cousin. Noah was especially excited he finally had a boy cousin. Though, Evie definitely looks the most taken with him.  

Terry was trying to police the littles, Samuel and Ezra, which was stressful, so we left after a couple quick photos. Plus, I was exhausted out of my head after only a couple hours sleep the night before and a very short nap. It was bed time for all of us.

Ezra sure looks huge compared to newborn Theo :(

Here's that larger family, looking good despite their exhaustion, Nathan, Ana and Theo. 

He's so cute! I was so blessed and proud to have been a part of the birth of baby Theo. 

doula-ing

 Our friends Seth and Kagney had been married for nearly eight years when they found out they were finally pregnant with their very first child. Perhaps because I was outspoken about how wonderful my birth was outside of the hospital at the birth center in Whitewood, SD, they came to me wanting to hear more about my experiences so they could make a more informed decision about choosing a provider. After having had three babies in three different hospitals and then having had a water birth (plus being a nurse), I felt I had a pretty good perspective. I just told them how very much superior the midwife model was for me compared to the hospital show-up-and-catch-the-baby-and-have-almost-no-support model. I guess they liked what I had to say because they decided to go to the same midwife I used. 

What surprised me more was that they asked me to be their doula (a doula is a labor support person, not in replacement of the husband of course. because, really, a laboring woman needs all the help she can get!)! I'd never had a doula and didn't know if I could do the job, but since the midwife suggested me and I've had four kids, I agreed. I did more research to compliment what I already knew from school and felt pretty good about it. We met three times before Kagney went in to labor to talk about pregnancy and labor and what to expect. It was teaching and question and answer time over mochas. That was fun. 

I had told them several times not to expect the baby to come early since that hardly ever happens with first time mothers. But we were a little concerned about it since Terry was going to be out of town for Dare 2 Share the weekend before her due date. Who would watch my kids if she went in to labor early and Terry was gone? I could have worked something out of course, but thought the probability was pretty low. But low and behold, at the exact moment that Terry arrived back at the church from Dare 2 Share, Kagney's water broke. Seriously. Terry returned at 6pm on Sunday January 9th and that's when Kagney went in to labor. Talk about divine timing!

I was able to spend a couple hours with Terry before Seth, Kagney and I drove the 45 minutes to the birth center to be checked out and administered her first dose of antibiotics since she was Group B Step positive. She was already 3 cm dilated but we were sent back home with two more doses of antibiotics for the next eight hours (you can't be admitted unless you're in very active labor). I got to bed at 130am but was so worked up I could not sleep for anything! At 345am I headed across town to Seth and Kagney's to give her the next dose of antibiotics. She was having more contractions, but we were mostly trying to rest. At 8am for her next dose the contractions were picking up and Kagney was having to breathe through them and was feeling pretty nauseous. I thought we had better leave for the birth center since it sounded to me like she was getting pretty close. 

I was wrong! She had only gained 1cm. That was a very discouraging time for all of us, due in part to how very tired we all were. But I felt bad since I made the call. I definitely learned a lot by that choice. So the midwife sent us out to get some breakfast (no one had eaten since the night before and it was 10am and we needed fuel!) and to do some walking. We went to Perkins in Spearfish since that sounded good to Kagney. It was definitely good to eat. Her contractions were coming every 4 to 5 minutes lasting about a minute and were pretty strong, but we were still feeling so very tired. After having had some food, I was able to be more positive. Another thing learned!

Kagney breathing through a contraction at Perkins. We were pretty sure our waitress knew Kagney was in labor and was totally freaked out, which we thought was really amusing. It seemed like she gave us the check a little too quickly. Ha!

We went back to the birth center at 12pm for the next dose of antibiotics and were advised to go rest somewhere (since we had nearly NO sleep all night and were plain exhausted) and then walk to get things moving more. We decided to get a hotel in Sturgis instead of going all the way back to Rapid. We all tried to rest, but Kagney's contractions were coming often enough, it was pretty impossible. So we just tried lots of different positions to help her and applied a lot of counterpressure to her poor back. After a couple hours, Kagney was finally able to get some rest. By then it was about 4pm and time for the next dose of antibiotics. At first I was just going to go grab them and come back to the hotel when Jeanne thought she'd come herself and check on Kagney. We were told enough rest and more activity! But Kagney was now dilated to a 6 so we could be admitted to the birth center.

Being able to go to the birth center was such a relief. And once there, Kagney's labor definitely picked up. Seth or I was coaching her through every single contraction and she was doing wonderfully even though I could tell they hurt like the dickens. After about an hour and a half Kagney was able to labor in the tub and I know that's a nice feeling. She was almost there! 

In fact, she hadn't been laboring long in the tub before it was time to push. Poor Kagney ended up pushing for about one hour! I had no concept of this from my own experience. I had only ever pushed about five times in that many minutes (and most likely less time) and I was done and the baby was born. Kagney did so great though. She had wonderful support and instructions and birthed that baby all by herself at 803pm on Monday January 10th. It was beautiful!

I had completely forgotten that they didn't know the gender since I had been so concerned on getting that baby out. But they went to check and it was a girl! She looked big too.

Kagney was quick to share her name and it's meaning: Elyada Mae, Hebrew for God has heard. They had waited quite a while for God to give them a baby and God heard them! She ended up being 8 pounds and 5 ounces. 

After getting Kagney and Seth dinner and having a little myself once she was all settled, I was finally able to go home. It had been about 24 hours with maybe 30 minutes of sleep! So tired. But so good. In my eagerness to get home, I didn't even have a chance to hold baby Elyada! That plus there was just too much going on for me to even have the chance. So two days later before Awana and Youth Group, I brought all of my kids and I was able to hold her and they were able to meet her. They really wanted to since they had been praying for us during the labor (I had asked my family for prayers throughout the day and especially during pushing). In fact, we think Elyada was born just after the kids and Terry prayed that she would be born. God heard again!

What an amazing experience. I'm so thankful and proud to have been a part of it. 

Ezra's birth

We began this fourth pregnancy with an Obstetrician but ended up switching to a Midwife at 34 weeks (to be clear, I did like our OB). Although I had healthy births in the hospital with all three of my other children, I was anxious about going into the hospital again. I have always felt that women are treated like cattle there. You are forced through their system and there's nothing much you can do about it. I didn't want to be hooked up to the monitor for 20 minutes of every hour, thus restricting my movement. I wanted to have real support, not a nurse looking at the Electronic Fetal Monitor instead of me. I didn't want to have drugs pushed at me. I didn't want the baby taken away from me right after birth even to be wiped up. I wanted Terry to be able to cut the cord (something they always say they'll allow but somehow never do). There are so many other reasons I don't like the hospital experience. So when we heard that the OB that delivered our firstborn (bad experience) was the back-up for our new OB, we researched our options and discovered that it was possible to switch care to our lovely Midwife Jeanne and have a water birth. So that's what we did, even though we had to drive 40 minutes, our insurance was a pain in the neck and we were worried my labor might be too fast to reach the birth center in time.

The ultrasound dates for baby Ezra were consistently May 30. And not to be picky or anything, but 266 days after conceiving was actually May 31 (since I knew exactly when we conceived). And our insurance deductible was scheduled to reset June 1. So we had been praying for quite some time that God would bring this baby "early" (all of our previous children had been late) so we wouldn't have to pay our deductible twice. 

I had also been dealing with a fair amount of anxiety about going through labor again. I had some pretty vivid memories of the pain of childbirth that I wasn't eager to experience again. Jeanne was very encouraging here regarding how much the water birth would help. Having never done it before though, I was still scared.

So on May 30 we headed to our 40 week appointment with Jeanne at the birth center. She stripped my membranes and sent us walking. Though I did have considerable pressure and some contractions, they were not the real strong ones that accompany labor. After two miles, we went back to the birth center where Jeanne stripped again and gave me orders to walk some more.                                                                                                                                                         

walking in Whitewood where the birth center is located

From there we went to the ranch where Terry's folks were watching the kids. I walked. And walked some more. And walked some more! I walked three more miles at the ranch. That night we were both exhausted. We went to bed early and slept hard. We had my mom sleep over just in case anything happened during the night.

4 wheeler ride at the ranch with daddy

The following morning (May 31) I woke at 5am with a full bladder. When I laid back down after a trip to the bathroom I had a couple light contractions with enough force to get me wondering if something was happening. Then I had a genuine labor contraction and I woke Terry. He took a shower and I laid there freaking out inside. I was so scared! I didn't want to go through labor again even though I was thankful and cognizant that the timing was perfect - it was my actual "due date" and exactly one day before our insurance reset. I got up and started getting ready. Terry called Jeanne who told us to head to the birth center. Then I realized that the contractions were like 10 minutes apart and perhaps we shouldn't go yet. We had breakfast, though I couldn't eat much because I was so nervous. I called Jeanne and told her how far apart the contractions were and she insisted we get on the road because of my history of fast labors (Evie's birth was only 2 hours start to finish and Samuel's birth was 3 hours. Noah's was 4-5 hours.). So we headed out the door. Samuel was up and I went in and kissed him good bye and he went back to sleep.

On the way to the birth center, I had only a few minor contractions. I was so incredibly filled with fear and anxiety. Then I got a text from a friend at church that said, "'The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.' Deuteronomy 31:8" Instant tears. That was exactly what I needed to hear and it was like God spoke it right to my heart. Then we looked out the window and saw a very beautiful rainbow and I was reminded of another promise the Lord made and of His faithfulness. You'd think I would have stopped being afraid after all of this, but I couldn't!

 We arrived at the birth center at 730am and Jeanne and the nurses could tell I was upset. I was on the verge of tears. They were so reassuring though! They said exactly what I needed to hear and I knew I was in good hands. I was glad we had come when Jeanne said to because I felt safe and protected. My fears finally abated a little. 

Jeanne said I should walk to increase the frequency of the contractions so that's what I did for a bit. The contractions were still like 8-10 minutes apart. I was perplexed. Usually when I go into labor, it's like wham-bam-we're-in-a-hurry contractions and I can hardly catch my breath (hence the anxiety). So we opted to get some natural pitocin (oxytocin) going with the pump. We did that for a half hour and my contractions went down to 2 minutes apart. Of course, once I got off the pump, they slowed down to like 5-6 minutes apart.

It was so strange having contractions so far apart. I was used to contractions every 2 or 3 minutes from the onset of labor. This time I was just walking around the birth center waiting to have another contraction, hoping that I would move along and not be there all day. Another thing was that I needed to be in pretty established active labor to get into the warm water tub. I really wanted that tub. So I walked and Terry recorded the contractions in his phone. We talked to the nurses. Terry read news stories from his phone. I didn't realize it at the time, but he was feeling very sick that day. Poor guy.

Finally, at like 11am, we decided that I was established enough to get into the tub. It was a nice feeling being in there. I had a contraction right away, and initially, I didn't think that it felt all that different in the water verses all the contractions I had been having up to that point. After only a few minutes I had to get out and pee though. With the regaining of full gravity on my body, I was all too ready to get back in that tub. Something about the water really does help. I didn't even realize how much it helped until a few days later. After looking at the contractions Terry recorded, they were so short - only like 30 to 45 seconds long. To me they seemed longer and further apart. I thought I was getting no where.

Terry or Jeanne would rub my back while I had a contraction and it was so helpful. The way I dealt with the contractions was deep controlled breathing. For me, if I tense up, freak out or get really loud, it gets worse and I can't deal with the pain. I wish I had known how to do that for my first two births!

While I was in the tub, it seemed like the contractions were so far apart and were not strong enough for me to be nearing the end of labor. However, I was wrong. Jeanne was able to tell how I was progressing based on my reports of pain and pressure in my back. After she checked me, she reported that I was complete and ready to push. I said, "Really? Are you sure?" I didn't feel like I had gone through the dreaded transition phase at all. I remember the out of control painful contractions I had at transition with my other births and it was that memory that had me so afraid. What I realized after talking to Jeanne was that I had not been feeling the full force of the contractions due to the water - or "aqua-dural" as another nurse put it. The contractions I was experiencing were probably longer than I could feel but due to the water, I only felt the most intense part of the contraction. And even that part was do-able.

So before I knew it Jeanne was coaching me through pushing. The water didn't change that from hurting pretty bad. But it was only like four contractions long before Ezra was out and I didn't tear at all! After about three pushes, Jeanne instructed me to feel the babies head and I was so surprised his head was already out. On the next contraction I pushed him out and caught him myself, bringing him up out of the water immediately. Talk about amazing.

I was so surprised and overwhelmed and relieved and overjoyed. I did it! 

He perked up and cried right away. They don't breathe until their face hits the air so there wasn't a risk of him drowning. They go from water to water to air. It's a very relaxed entry into the world. Plus, the nurses didn't whisk him away immediately and clean him up. I got to hold him first. My baby!

Terry said it was the best experience for him too. Jeanne and the nurses worked around him and let him have a good view. He'd never seen any of our kids' births so clearly before. He definitely teared up.

Terry got to cut the cord and hold Ezra after that.

After I got out of the tub, I got to nurse Ezra right away. Then Jeanne took him to weigh him and do the other tests. He was 7 pounds and 12 ounces and 20.5 inches long.

He lost the swollen post-birth face so quickly!

All done being picked on and ready for snuggling.

Jeanne is holding Ezra, Erica is in the green and my nursing school classmate Chelsea is on the right. These ladies were wonderful. When it seemed like my labor was progressing kind of slowly, all three circled up around me and prayed for me. They were so supportive and encouraging. Frankly, I felt spoiled! They made my last birth experience a dream come true. It was everything I wanted.

I'm looking quite pale in this photo because I must have lost more blood than my other births. I nearly passed out in the shower! After some IV fluids I was all better. And then we were ready to go home (that's how she does it there).

Ezra's first ride in the car seat.

Pulling out from the Birth Center we could see that Jeanne was already announcing Ezra's birth.

it's a...

...BOY!

Hence the blue color I added.

We had our 20 week ultrasound on January 10, 2013. We even took Evie and Noah along because we thought thought would enjoy seeing the "moving pictures" of the baby inside mommy (of course little Samuel couldn't come because he's the destroyer baby). 

Evie had been so sure that she was going to have a baby sister. From the very beginning when we told her about the baby, she'd say things like "When my baby sister gets here...," etc. So we started to think, maybe, perhaps she was right. Really, I was feeling pretty sure that we were going to have a girl. But as time went on, this pregnancy began feeling and looking like Noah and Samuel's and not Evie's. So I began to prepare myself for finding out it was not a girl. And that's just what we found out. The ultrasound tech said she was 99% sure and printed us off a photo that leaves no doubt. 

So, this 6 pack is going to be heavy on the boy side! Hopefully he's not as rascally as he looks (the tech said that wasn't his tongue. perhaps he's just very friendly and was waving to us all!).

6 Bears

I figured I should make an official blog pregnancy announcement instead of sneakily putting up the evidence and relying on facebook. 

We are expecting baby bear #4 at the end of May!

We found out mid-September and told family right away via this riddle that Terry came up with:

The answer is SIX PACK, if you hadn't guessed before already. 

We had been talking about having one more baby for a while and God just went ahead and made that happen for us. We didn't even have to wait the seemingly "normal" three years in between like with Evie and Samuel. Samuel will be just over two years old when this baby comes. Hopefully that won't be a shock to my system...if four children isn't. 

Wee baby at 10 weeks.

baby belly progression

I once saw a pregnancy progression of belly photos and thought that I'd like to try that. So that's what all those baby belly posts have been about. And now I've combined them for easy viewing. Pregnancy is an amazing thing.

17.5 weeks, 8/27/10. This was the first photo I took b/c I had just "popped."

19 weeks, 9/3/10. Though this was a maternity shirt, I could not even fit in it during the third trimester.

20 weeks, 9/9/10. This was the halfway point and also the ultrasound date.

24.5 weeks, 10/4/10

27 weeks, 11/1/10

30 weeks, 11/20/10

32 weeks, 12/7/10

34 weeks, 12/18/10

36 weeks, 12/31/10

38 weeks, 1/14/11

40 weeks, 1/29/11. Here I was past the due date of 1/26/11. Samuel was born 2/1/11 and weighed 8 pounds and 8 ounces.

Almost 2 weeks old on 2/14/11. Samuel had his 2 week check up, weighing in at 9 pounds.

Samuel's birth

Finally, the 40 weeks of my third pregnancy are up - though it was more like 41 weeks.

Samuel Jonathon was born at 4:58am on Tuesday, February 1st, 2011. He weighed in at 8 pounds, 8 ounces and was 21 inches long. I was right, our kids keep getting bigger.

When Terry and I went to bed on Monday, January 31, I was feeling quite restless and nervous...

I had been to the OB that morning and was declared 4cm dilated. My doctor encouraged us to schedule an induction since I was already almost a week overdue. So we allowed him to schedule the torturous pitocin drip for 6am Thursday February 3rd, praying that we wouldn't have to show up for it (I was induced with Noah and did not want to experience that again).

That night we watched the weather and learned that it was going to be like -40 degrees outside with blowing snow and the barometric pressure rising. I had a bad feeling that that night was the night. We put the kids to bed and I thought we might not be there in the morning to get their breakfast (my parents were already here). Turns out, I was right.

I couldn't sleep. And when I finally did drop off, I was awoken at just before 2am with a serious contraction. It was like a dream. It woke me and I groaned and woke Terry. I had another contraction soon after and knew they were the real deal, much different from the false labor contractions I had the week before. I was immediately nervous. Months before this I had continually been so full of fear of the pain I was going to be going through. We had prayed about it quite a bit and I was learning about trusting God to care for me. But I started out nervous.

Terry jumped into action while I lay in bed. He dressed, woke my parents, put in his contacts and started his Blazer. While he was busy, I was already having to breath through the contractions - they were quite strong since I was already dilated so far. Terry came back for me and we said good bye to my parents and drove to the Gburg hospital - there was no way we were driving to NP with the coldest weather of the year.

We arrived at the hospital at 230am and they wheeled me down to the Labor and Delivery Suite. They already had my birth plan and were most willing to oblige me, thankfully. They monitored the baby for 20 minutes and then let me get up and be free, which I was so ready to do (with Evie they made me stay in bed, this time I wanted to move).

Here is Terry after an hour and a half of labor (love that the clock is in the background). He is quite excited, though I don't even remember this shot being taken!

So I sat in the rocking chair and worked through the contractions. With my other births I never took seriously the laboring options I had studied. With Samuel, I mostly did deep breathing. I also tried to relax all the muscles in my body. The contractions were intense and pretty darn close together at 1-3 minutes. Terry recorded all of them in his phone. Pretty amazing of him.

Here is Terry praying for me between one of the contractions. I felt like God was being so kind to me and said so, like He was giving me good breaks - actually, I think they just felt like long breaks b/c they weren't actually.

I started out feeling nervous but pretty soon had to concentrate so much that I didn't have time for anything else. All the fear left me. God really gave me a great labor - only 3 hours! I just found myself able to deal with the pain, get through it and rest in between contractions. Actually, I felt a lot like Bella from Twilight as she was becoming a vampire (totally lame I know) - that if I started to freak out I wouldn't be able to cope with the pain. I felt like I handled it pretty well. Doctor Hult said I was very stoic. The nurses said I was a rock star. Terry was continually encouraging. So I kinda just dealt with it and that worked well for me. No epidural and surprisingly, compared to Noah and Evie's birth, I didn't even feel like I needed one.

I asked my mom to come with - she has a very calming presence. I was so glad she was there. In between contractions she read to me (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - I don't care if you think I'm a heathen b/c I LOVE those books!).

Soon, I had been laboring for nearly 3 hours and the nurse requested I move back to the bed to be monitored again. Then things really picked up. I was in transition and there was nothing I could do to cope. I wasn't stoic anymore. Pushing was very different than it was for Noah or Evie. But it was over pretty quickly and Samuel was born. After they mopped him up, they handed him right to me. I was a little emotional...

It's so overwhelming to meet your child for the first time. It's hard to believe that you were carrying that little person around inside of you. They never existed before and here they are, brand new, complete and perfect.

The nurses were asking me how much I thought he weighed. I thought he looked so small that I was just so surprised when they said 8 pounds and 8 ounces! He was also 21 inches long.

With lots of dark hair, as you can see.

Proud papa Terry almost a half hour after Samuel was born.